Not to get all personal with a post here, but amongst the 1000 things I wanted to get posted up here but haven't had the time is a story.
It is a story of a cell phone.
Saturday I took the plunge and went about buying a new phone. Some of you may or may not know what my cell phone looks like, but rest assured its at least 3 years old and in cell-phone terms, a total relic.
And with the new phone on the way from "corporate" (note: there is a total sidebar story here on the strange and completely counter-productive business practices of cell-phone companies, but anyway), there's a few days in here where my phone is sort of in this life-support stage, where I know and it knows its about to be put to sleep for good, but together we hang on for a little while longer.
You see, cell phones mean nothing to me, and I have no real reason to have an attachment to this one at all. Its ugly, awkward, the buttons rarely work, has a cracked screen, the battery is shot and it never got decent reception on a consistent basis the entire time I owned it.
Despite all of this, I admit I have some strange sentimental attachment to the thing.
It has bowling and parachute on it as games - games that I know shouldn't keep a 4 year old's attention for 5 minutes, but for some reason actually had enticed me to learn how to not just figure out the controls of each game, but how to beat it entirely.
It has the memory capacity for like 3 text messages at a time before it crashes. It wasn't something I ever really cared about until one day no one called each other - they only IMed each other using phones (i.e. texted). Still, I almost grew to like having to figure out how to text people without using the "r" "s" or "t" letters because the number 7 didn't work.
I'll also never forget the time that it wouldn't hang up - the end button stopped working - and I contemplated the notion that I could, theoretically, be on the phone forever one day unless the key decided to cooperate once again. I had secretly hoped one day I would call someone who had the same problem, and then we could keep our phone call going forever and see if those unlimited nights and weekends really were unlimited.
But that doesn't really match the time I lost the phone in school, and eventually found it laying in a corner of the ole' baseball house up on S. Fifth. Next to it was an empty dip-spit bottle, usually the most disgusting thing in the world. This time though, it was second. That's because I found the contents of that dip-spit bottle spilled all over the face of the phone.
Or how about the time I needed to put together furniture in my new apartment, and I had nails, I had wood, but I didn't have a hammer? I thought the phone doubled as an extremely useful one.
Could I count the number of times it had hit the ground? Heck, I couldn't even count the number of times I found it in a puddle.
And was there a trip I took with it where I actually remembered the charger? Was there anything funnier than coming home with another one, just to put it in a pile of chargers I had that all barely worked right and never actually made me remember to bring them with me the next time?
I guess some of these questions lead me to somewhat of an understanding. As bad as it was, the thing had been through a lot with me. I treated it terribly, but I couldn't shake it - like a bad habit. I needed that thing.
And so I guess someone could understand why I care. It was a trooper. It sucked, but it had been through a lot. That was worth a little something.
But really though, gimme a break. It's a cell phone. Why write about it, above 1000s of other topics? Respect is one thing, but why am I suddenly misty-eyed and sentimental? (tongue, meet cheek)
I guess, as they say, we have to go back to the start.
It was born the day I took the "phone that came before" it in hand while stuffing clothes into a gym bag. The "phone that came before" was in the hand with my gym towel, and after I managed to get all the clothes in the bag, it was time to stuff the towel in, too. As I typically do, I like to fit too many things in too small of a holder, and this was no different. There was no room for the towel unless I stuffed it in there. And stuff is what I did. As I swung my arm back for one last stuff, the "phone that came before" accidentally slipped from my grasp on the upswing. I felt "the phone that came before" release - and I turned my head and saw it sail through the air. It sailed gracefully through the open doorway and across the hall. The arc was magnificent, and so must have been the velocity, because it continued to sail all the way across the hall and through another open door - the bathroom door. Well, almost through the bathroom door. You see, had it gone cleanly through, the phone I am eulogizing today would never have been mine. Instead, "the phone that came before" gently glanced off the bathroom door and changed direction as it began its descent to the ground.
It would never meet the ground, however. The glance was enough to hurdle it towards the toilet, where it would find one final open door. The toilet seat was up, and provided no resistance to the "phone that came before"'s impending progress to a liquid doom.
SPLOOSH. It was in one sense horrific, in another sense immaculate.
The "phone that came before" never worked again, and it was buried with the honor of having the most tragic and fantastical death ever to strike a cell phone.
Until the phone we remember today. You see, this phone didn't just take a beating and keep on ticking, this phone took a deathlike plunge even more catastrophic and impossible.
It came the day after Halloween, and again there were many things to carry and not enough hands to hold them. Our heroic phone was joined by its late-brother, an equally heroic and memorable mega-wallet that held every business card, ID card, credit card and gift card a person could ever imagine all at the same time. The phone and the wallet were joined by some keys, and they were on a journey to watch the beloved Bears at a young rogue's abode. As harmless as this sounds, terror would strike the situation before anyone could even realize what had happened.
You see, two more elements were present on this journey of death. One was a half-filled case of Miller Light long necks. It was agreed that they would make the trip back to the young rogue's abode, and because of the state of it's fluid contents needed utmost care in its transportation - it required a whole index finger to carry it with.
In the other hand, a California Raisin costume that was donned by yours truly the night before was placed on a hanger and resting within a palm. It was requested by the merchant that loaned it to me - and because of the oppressive time restraints of our agreement required that the costume make the trip - and consequently take up much needed hand space.
So here we were, one costume, one beer case, one wallet, my keys, and our tragic hero. 11 floors up, no pockets to work with and time at a premium, there was no way to make two trips for this - this had to be taken care of in one mission. How to do it?
Evil is born. The idea of using the space in the half-empty case comes to me. I place the mega-wallet and our hero inside the space. Genius. Now the hanger is picked up with my left hand. The keys in my right palm, and the beer case in the steady crook of my right index finger. I open the door, lock it carefully and am on my way.
To doom. I hit the elevator button. The door opens - I get in and JUST as it is about to close, I hear a rustle and a hustle, and I lean forward quickly to try to stop the door from shutting.
Crash. The beer case has slipped free from its iron-like shackles.
Panic. Beer is spilling everywhere. Glass is strewn about the elevator floor. More mess is to come and something needs to be done - and fast.
Open the door, pick up the case. Panic. What to do? The beer is getting everywhere.
Eureka. I run to the left, down the hall. Full sprint now, I throw open the utility door and pull open the garbage chute.
I fire the case down the chute.
Relief.
As I walk back to the elevator, I begin to think about how I will clean up the beer, and how a small mess almost turned into a big one.
And that is the point when it hit me. Tragedy. Despair. Catastrophe.
The beer, the mega-wallet, and our hero - all plunged eleven floors, drowning in suds, helplessly to their doom.
Like a mourner in denial, I coerced management to look for the bodies. I somehow obtained a carcass removal device, and dug threw the disgusting wreckage until I found the physical remains of my beloved.
The mega-wallet and the tragic hero recovered, I cleaned up and took the costume and the keys to my car. I was a shell of a man, shocked and horrified, but somehow reluctantly glad that I got to see my friends one last time.
I started my car, and began to drive away. A few minutes passed, and I grabbed our hero to try to begin cleaning and grooming it for a proper burial.
Then it happened.
Remember how I said "deathlike"?
You see, "the phone that came before" has still taken the most fantastical and impossible death plunge in the history of phones.
That is because this phone, our hero, the one that I mourn today, SURVIVED.
Cracked screen and hops-coated, it miraculously lit up. With some intensive care and prayers - it plodded on.
And it was that moment, that miraculous second that I realized I didn't just respect this phone. I loved this thing.
Rest In Peace, NOKIA 6610. You have given me more than just crappy reception, poor battery life and complete lack of status with women and friends. You have given me inspiration - and for that I will never forget.
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
Monday, January 29, 2007
So Sorry
I haven't gotten to posting lately - so this really hasn't even been worth checking. Stuff is coming, though. Good links, tidbits, and even original (!) work.
Until then, Go Bears. Also, check out this awesome article on city politics. As you read, play this game: How many employees of the city of Chicago are currently on disability? How many are related to city politicians? My guess is a lot, and my second guess is the overwhelming majority.
Who signed the alderman's papers?
Who signed alderman's papers?
Rival claims forgery, Solis denies it
January 29, 2007
BY ABDON M. PALLASCH Staff Reporter
The charge is serious: Ald. Danny Solis (25th), the president pro tempore of the Chicago City Council, had someone forge his notarized signatures on his statements of candidacy and economic interest while he was on a fact-finding trip to Israel with other Hispanic aldermen.
He was back from the trip before the final deadline, but they had to be filed while he was away to make him eligible for the lottery for top ballot spot for the Southwest Side ward that includes Pilsen.
Solis' attorneys have said he signed the documents himself before he left, and they expect the lawsuit filed against him Friday will be thrown out just as the electoral board threw out the charge earlier.
But Solis reportedly was seen talking angrily to his Chicago staff on his BlackBerry while in Israel, and handwriting expert Diana Marsh says whoever signed "Danny Solis" to the statement of candidacy and economic interest is not the same person who signed "Danny Solis" on all of Solis' other documents.
Solis has his own handwriting expert, Jack Calvert, who says the same person signed all of the documents. Solis has the high-powered law firm of Shefsky & Froelich as well as election law expert Burt Odelson representing him.
At least until Mayor Daley named Miguel del Valle city clerk last year, Solis was regarded as Daley's top Hispanic ally and perhaps even Daley's heir apparent -- or at least the mayor's choice to succeed Luis Gutierrez as congressman if Gutierrez retires.
Objections were tossed out
Rich Means, the election attorney who filed the case against Solis, said he was initially skeptical that the signatures were forged. A brief glance with the naked eye finds them pretty close. But after going over them with Marsh, Means said he became convinced they were "skillful forgeries."
Means said he became more convinced "by the fact that Solis has consistently refused to swear under oath that the signatures are valid and he has also refused to voluntarily give proper samples of his handwriting under supervision."
But no hearing officer has ordered Solis to do that yet, and he may never have to. So far, the objection against Solis' candidacy keeps getting tossed on procedural grounds because it was filed in two parts, each part incomplete.
Anthony Sutor, a political operative for Solis rival Ambrosio Medrano, filed the objection but forgot to include Sutor's address. Sutor is a city Transportation Department employee who has taken extensive disability leaves over the years, his current one due to stress and panic attacks caused by his divorce, he told the Chicago Sun-Times last summer.
Medrano was allowed to stay on the ballot by a Cook County judge Friday despite his conviction for taking bribes when he was alderman.
Sutor filed an amendment including his address. But the election board docketed it as a new complaint. Means argues they should be joined together since both were filed before deadline. But Solis persuaded the electoral board to keep them separate.
Medrano is also trying to bounce former Ald. Juan Soliz from the race, saying Soliz actually lives in Orland Park. Soliz says that while his wife and children live there, he spends most of his time at his home in the ward.
Lawmaker's brother running
Also in the race is Cuahutemoc "Temo" Morfin, a juvenile probation officer who owns a gym and who has been active in immigration reform demonstrations. Candidate Joe Acevedo, like Sutor, is on disability leave from his job as a city sewer worker. Acevedo is a brother of state Rep. Edward Acevedo.
Candidate Aaron del Valle is a police officer. Both del Valle and Acevedo were active in the Hispanic Democratic Organization, which used to support Solis. City Clerk Miguel del Valle has accused Aaron Del Valle of using the same style campaign posters and trying to piggyback on his campaign. Candidate Martha Padilla is an attorney.
apallasch@suntimes.com
Until then, Go Bears. Also, check out this awesome article on city politics. As you read, play this game: How many employees of the city of Chicago are currently on disability? How many are related to city politicians? My guess is a lot, and my second guess is the overwhelming majority.
Who signed the alderman's papers?
Who signed alderman's papers?
Rival claims forgery, Solis denies it
January 29, 2007
BY ABDON M. PALLASCH Staff Reporter
The charge is serious: Ald. Danny Solis (25th), the president pro tempore of the Chicago City Council, had someone forge his notarized signatures on his statements of candidacy and economic interest while he was on a fact-finding trip to Israel with other Hispanic aldermen.
He was back from the trip before the final deadline, but they had to be filed while he was away to make him eligible for the lottery for top ballot spot for the Southwest Side ward that includes Pilsen.
Solis' attorneys have said he signed the documents himself before he left, and they expect the lawsuit filed against him Friday will be thrown out just as the electoral board threw out the charge earlier.
But Solis reportedly was seen talking angrily to his Chicago staff on his BlackBerry while in Israel, and handwriting expert Diana Marsh says whoever signed "Danny Solis" to the statement of candidacy and economic interest is not the same person who signed "Danny Solis" on all of Solis' other documents.
Solis has his own handwriting expert, Jack Calvert, who says the same person signed all of the documents. Solis has the high-powered law firm of Shefsky & Froelich as well as election law expert Burt Odelson representing him.
At least until Mayor Daley named Miguel del Valle city clerk last year, Solis was regarded as Daley's top Hispanic ally and perhaps even Daley's heir apparent -- or at least the mayor's choice to succeed Luis Gutierrez as congressman if Gutierrez retires.
Objections were tossed out
Rich Means, the election attorney who filed the case against Solis, said he was initially skeptical that the signatures were forged. A brief glance with the naked eye finds them pretty close. But after going over them with Marsh, Means said he became convinced they were "skillful forgeries."
Means said he became more convinced "by the fact that Solis has consistently refused to swear under oath that the signatures are valid and he has also refused to voluntarily give proper samples of his handwriting under supervision."
But no hearing officer has ordered Solis to do that yet, and he may never have to. So far, the objection against Solis' candidacy keeps getting tossed on procedural grounds because it was filed in two parts, each part incomplete.
Anthony Sutor, a political operative for Solis rival Ambrosio Medrano, filed the objection but forgot to include Sutor's address. Sutor is a city Transportation Department employee who has taken extensive disability leaves over the years, his current one due to stress and panic attacks caused by his divorce, he told the Chicago Sun-Times last summer.
Medrano was allowed to stay on the ballot by a Cook County judge Friday despite his conviction for taking bribes when he was alderman.
Sutor filed an amendment including his address. But the election board docketed it as a new complaint. Means argues they should be joined together since both were filed before deadline. But Solis persuaded the electoral board to keep them separate.
Medrano is also trying to bounce former Ald. Juan Soliz from the race, saying Soliz actually lives in Orland Park. Soliz says that while his wife and children live there, he spends most of his time at his home in the ward.
Lawmaker's brother running
Also in the race is Cuahutemoc "Temo" Morfin, a juvenile probation officer who owns a gym and who has been active in immigration reform demonstrations. Candidate Joe Acevedo, like Sutor, is on disability leave from his job as a city sewer worker. Acevedo is a brother of state Rep. Edward Acevedo.
Candidate Aaron del Valle is a police officer. Both del Valle and Acevedo were active in the Hispanic Democratic Organization, which used to support Solis. City Clerk Miguel del Valle has accused Aaron Del Valle of using the same style campaign posters and trying to piggyback on his campaign. Candidate Martha Padilla is an attorney.
apallasch@suntimes.com
Monday, January 22, 2007
Too much of a good thing
It's almost too perfect of a situation to frame this particular rant.
The Bears just demolished the Saints, 39-14. They are headed to the Superbowl, as underdogs, against the Indianapolis Colts.
Bookies had the Bears as 2 1/2 point favorites, and made a ton of money as people continually took their money and put them on the Saints.
What some people may not know is that in the span of 3 days, the line fell 3 POINTS from 5 1/2 to 2 1/2. What the hell happened in that amount of time that almost completely altered the line of the NFC Championship game?
No one was injured on the Bears - no one. The Saints, in fact, were the only team to lose a guy during the week when they declared Joe Horn officially unable to play sometime on Thursday. What did the bookies learn over those two days that made them think that the Saints could pull this thing off?
Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Not one football thought or fact actually played into the line of the game moving. It moved because everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, put money on the Saints. I don't know how they would have covered those losses had the Saints actually covered the spread, because 3 people on earth would have lost.
The bookies moved the line because they were scared shitless. When the money is almost even, the bookies do okay and don't really have to worry about who wins or covers the spread. However, when everyone and their mother takes a certain team, its panic time. Everyone winning = them losing, and they can't have that.
With the line lowered to 2 1/2, the action was still all Saints. My guess is that a bunch of odds makers actually, for the first time in playoff football history, considered actually changing who was the favorite of the game midweek (at least the first time when someone was almost a touchdown favorite).
But last second, someone said something logical. "If you look at this game honestly, I think the Bears are actually the real favorite to win this thing. Let's stick it out." I'm guessing a "if we lose this its your legs, buddy" type of deal amongst them all, and they decided to give football logic the benefit of the doubt ahead of mass football hysteria.
And wow, did that decision pay off. Congrats bookies. You didn't buy the story.
What story?
The sports story that was being sold to American people on a daily basis, courtesy of ABC/ESPN. You see, ESPN actually had every single one of it's "experts" pick against the Bears. They ran features on the Saints. They routinely played them up as "unstoppable", "poised"; a team of destiny. The Bears were continually portrayed as lucky and clumsy; their QB presented not as a first year starter being the central difference in his team making the Superbowl this year, but as a man so terrible at his job, they routinely called on faulty AP reports that he was going to be benched, and even had the audacity to frame his 282 yard performance against the Seahawks as sub-par.
What resulted is a real story. 100,000s of people are out big money, and look pretty stupid right now taking a dome-team road-dog in the NFC title game. People ate up this "analysis" like it was gospel, and they are all paying for it now.
You see, no one with a hint of football logic could be that shocked the Bears won. In fact, looking back on the game now, its almost ridiculous to see how the Bears weren't at least a 7 point favorite. A 5 1/2 point line was pretty tight considering all of the shortcomings of the Saints team.
But no one heard about those. It wasn't in the storyline. You see, ESPN is the network that changed the world as we know it. The fact is, almost everyone has an affinity for some sport or another (if not all). People use it as a way to come together, to converse, to celebrate, and most of all to get away. Humans will always love to have fun, and sports are just that - fun. We pay too much money to watch, we invest too much energy and time caring, we lose perspective on its real role in the world, and yet, this all being the case, it doesn't seem that evil after all. When the idea of televising sporting events on a daily basis, 24/hrs a day came into being, we ate it up. We watched sportscenter to see the scores, we watched ESPN2 to see stuff we never saw before. But then it became uncool to watch weird sports (when nothing else was on to televise), not universal enough to televise obscure collegiate sports or other semi-pro type events, and so ESPN eventually realized they had more airtime than they could conceivably fill with live sports or highlights of those sports.
But instead of staying true to the mission, and keeping the idea of ESPN an enjoyable experience for everyone - they took it in a different direction. Instead of covering the actual sporting events, they decided to talk about them, using opinion-based shows and interview-style highlight segments. While the connection between the sports world and the real world was one that they did originally try to cover (and did so pretty well), they eventually found that taking on real issues and real stories wasn't always exciting on a daily basis, so they decided they had to invent story lines. Suddenly it began to grow: The homerun chase of '98 was really the baptism of this type of sports coverage. Sosa and McGwire, crowned by the same network that is now out to tarnish them, were used to "save baseball" - and also save Sportscenter from actually covering sports news thoroughly and accurately. Later, Kobe vs. Shaq was one of the storylines that the network covered ahead of actual sports. Once that ended, there was Phil Jackson insanity, followed by Belicheck being crowned a genius, followed by the birth of the T.O. phenomena, which went right alongside the obsession they had with a certain sports agent, followed by an obsession with Bill Parcells, followed by all things Barry Bonds, followed by T.O..the Red Sox..Bartman...etc...
But stories are, although often untrue, usually popular. They become gossipy. They are debatable, mainly because so much opinion can be used and so little fact needs to be presented. And this, apparently, appeals to viewers and proves to be some form of satisfying entertainment for many. Although, for me it seems a lot more like Entertainment Tonight than an actual sports broadcast.
This isn't to say that sports doesn't ever produce storylines. But there's a difference between covering sports and seeing a story develop naturally, and trying to plant one where one just refuses to grow. Apparently, people want to hear these finely crafted stories more than ever - because ESPN is clearly a healthy corporate entity. But what if reality just flat out refuses to cooperate with the script?
Today, Bill Parcells, a huge ESPN character for many years, retired and an honest reporter was covering it for the "boo-yah"s. The story was presented, the facts were read, but before the guy could get off the air, the host of the show asked "Did he retire because of T.O.?"
One last try to squeeze this event into the world of an invented ESPN storyline. Simply stunning. To the guy's credit, the reporter completely dismissed the comment as strange and ridiculous and signed off. The dumbass anchor went on with his moronic monologue.
Which takes me back to the Bears/Saints game, as it compares to the Bears/Saints invented storyline.
The article currently on ESPN's NFL Tab, AFTER THE CHAMPIONSHIP GAMES ON MONDAY. Yes, this is what is on the website. I joked with a friend that we would have to listen to two weeks of Saints coverage before the Superbowl (even though they aren't in it). So far, I am right for the first day of week 1. No joke.
Once again, reality and the story just don't match, and the network that has created it cannot admit to being the spoon stirring the pot. There will continue to be a lack of resources and energy spent on covering the actual game this week as we head to Superbowl XVI. No doubt about it, the wrong teams won the game as far as ESPN is concerned, but they aren't going to let it stop them from jotting down a few more lines in their scripts.
And why not? Everyone loves ESPN. They are the worldwide leader.
Although, can we now safely ask them, "the worldwide leader of what?". It sure isn't sports.
The Bears just demolished the Saints, 39-14. They are headed to the Superbowl, as underdogs, against the Indianapolis Colts.
Bookies had the Bears as 2 1/2 point favorites, and made a ton of money as people continually took their money and put them on the Saints.
What some people may not know is that in the span of 3 days, the line fell 3 POINTS from 5 1/2 to 2 1/2. What the hell happened in that amount of time that almost completely altered the line of the NFC Championship game?
No one was injured on the Bears - no one. The Saints, in fact, were the only team to lose a guy during the week when they declared Joe Horn officially unable to play sometime on Thursday. What did the bookies learn over those two days that made them think that the Saints could pull this thing off?
Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Not one football thought or fact actually played into the line of the game moving. It moved because everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, put money on the Saints. I don't know how they would have covered those losses had the Saints actually covered the spread, because 3 people on earth would have lost.
The bookies moved the line because they were scared shitless. When the money is almost even, the bookies do okay and don't really have to worry about who wins or covers the spread. However, when everyone and their mother takes a certain team, its panic time. Everyone winning = them losing, and they can't have that.
With the line lowered to 2 1/2, the action was still all Saints. My guess is that a bunch of odds makers actually, for the first time in playoff football history, considered actually changing who was the favorite of the game midweek (at least the first time when someone was almost a touchdown favorite).
But last second, someone said something logical. "If you look at this game honestly, I think the Bears are actually the real favorite to win this thing. Let's stick it out." I'm guessing a "if we lose this its your legs, buddy" type of deal amongst them all, and they decided to give football logic the benefit of the doubt ahead of mass football hysteria.
And wow, did that decision pay off. Congrats bookies. You didn't buy the story.
What story?
The sports story that was being sold to American people on a daily basis, courtesy of ABC/ESPN. You see, ESPN actually had every single one of it's "experts" pick against the Bears. They ran features on the Saints. They routinely played them up as "unstoppable", "poised"; a team of destiny. The Bears were continually portrayed as lucky and clumsy; their QB presented not as a first year starter being the central difference in his team making the Superbowl this year, but as a man so terrible at his job, they routinely called on faulty AP reports that he was going to be benched, and even had the audacity to frame his 282 yard performance against the Seahawks as sub-par.
What resulted is a real story. 100,000s of people are out big money, and look pretty stupid right now taking a dome-team road-dog in the NFC title game. People ate up this "analysis" like it was gospel, and they are all paying for it now.
You see, no one with a hint of football logic could be that shocked the Bears won. In fact, looking back on the game now, its almost ridiculous to see how the Bears weren't at least a 7 point favorite. A 5 1/2 point line was pretty tight considering all of the shortcomings of the Saints team.
But no one heard about those. It wasn't in the storyline. You see, ESPN is the network that changed the world as we know it. The fact is, almost everyone has an affinity for some sport or another (if not all). People use it as a way to come together, to converse, to celebrate, and most of all to get away. Humans will always love to have fun, and sports are just that - fun. We pay too much money to watch, we invest too much energy and time caring, we lose perspective on its real role in the world, and yet, this all being the case, it doesn't seem that evil after all. When the idea of televising sporting events on a daily basis, 24/hrs a day came into being, we ate it up. We watched sportscenter to see the scores, we watched ESPN2 to see stuff we never saw before. But then it became uncool to watch weird sports (when nothing else was on to televise), not universal enough to televise obscure collegiate sports or other semi-pro type events, and so ESPN eventually realized they had more airtime than they could conceivably fill with live sports or highlights of those sports.
But instead of staying true to the mission, and keeping the idea of ESPN an enjoyable experience for everyone - they took it in a different direction. Instead of covering the actual sporting events, they decided to talk about them, using opinion-based shows and interview-style highlight segments. While the connection between the sports world and the real world was one that they did originally try to cover (and did so pretty well), they eventually found that taking on real issues and real stories wasn't always exciting on a daily basis, so they decided they had to invent story lines. Suddenly it began to grow: The homerun chase of '98 was really the baptism of this type of sports coverage. Sosa and McGwire, crowned by the same network that is now out to tarnish them, were used to "save baseball" - and also save Sportscenter from actually covering sports news thoroughly and accurately. Later, Kobe vs. Shaq was one of the storylines that the network covered ahead of actual sports. Once that ended, there was Phil Jackson insanity, followed by Belicheck being crowned a genius, followed by the birth of the T.O. phenomena, which went right alongside the obsession they had with a certain sports agent, followed by an obsession with Bill Parcells, followed by all things Barry Bonds, followed by T.O..the Red Sox..Bartman...etc...
But stories are, although often untrue, usually popular. They become gossipy. They are debatable, mainly because so much opinion can be used and so little fact needs to be presented. And this, apparently, appeals to viewers and proves to be some form of satisfying entertainment for many. Although, for me it seems a lot more like Entertainment Tonight than an actual sports broadcast.
This isn't to say that sports doesn't ever produce storylines. But there's a difference between covering sports and seeing a story develop naturally, and trying to plant one where one just refuses to grow. Apparently, people want to hear these finely crafted stories more than ever - because ESPN is clearly a healthy corporate entity. But what if reality just flat out refuses to cooperate with the script?
Today, Bill Parcells, a huge ESPN character for many years, retired and an honest reporter was covering it for the "boo-yah"s. The story was presented, the facts were read, but before the guy could get off the air, the host of the show asked "Did he retire because of T.O.?"
One last try to squeeze this event into the world of an invented ESPN storyline. Simply stunning. To the guy's credit, the reporter completely dismissed the comment as strange and ridiculous and signed off. The dumbass anchor went on with his moronic monologue.
Which takes me back to the Bears/Saints game, as it compares to the Bears/Saints invented storyline.
The article currently on ESPN's NFL Tab, AFTER THE CHAMPIONSHIP GAMES ON MONDAY. Yes, this is what is on the website. I joked with a friend that we would have to listen to two weeks of Saints coverage before the Superbowl (even though they aren't in it). So far, I am right for the first day of week 1. No joke.
Once again, reality and the story just don't match, and the network that has created it cannot admit to being the spoon stirring the pot. There will continue to be a lack of resources and energy spent on covering the actual game this week as we head to Superbowl XVI. No doubt about it, the wrong teams won the game as far as ESPN is concerned, but they aren't going to let it stop them from jotting down a few more lines in their scripts.
And why not? Everyone loves ESPN. They are the worldwide leader.
Although, can we now safely ask them, "the worldwide leader of what?". It sure isn't sports.
Thursday, January 18, 2007
Level on the Inside
My schedule the last few weeks has been like this:
Work.
Work.
Work.
Work.
Eat.
Work.
Repeat.
Right after I find some time to sleep, I will find some time to post. I've got some stories saved up too - plus, a Bears thing to write. Anyway.
Two recommendations:
One, 97.9 The Loop(chicago) in the mornings. A longtime Chicago radio DJ, Johnny B (Brandmeier), has a morning show that has totally grown on me over the last few weeks. Check it out, it's clever, laid back, and damn funny. It reminds me of being a kid and loving Kevin Matthews - one of two kids on earth who listened to that DJ religiously.
Two: this hard-to-find video is of a song that is clearly pretty 'up there' on my personal all-time favorite songs. You might even find a line from this song in my "about me". Anyway, its a great jam, it has a great message. The band isn't really around anymore, and the video leaves something to be desired (still only like 43 views on YouTube), but as far as music goes - its top shelf baby.
Work.
Work.
Work.
Work.
Eat.
Work.
Repeat.
Right after I find some time to sleep, I will find some time to post. I've got some stories saved up too - plus, a Bears thing to write. Anyway.
Two recommendations:
One, 97.9 The Loop(chicago) in the mornings. A longtime Chicago radio DJ, Johnny B (Brandmeier), has a morning show that has totally grown on me over the last few weeks. Check it out, it's clever, laid back, and damn funny. It reminds me of being a kid and loving Kevin Matthews - one of two kids on earth who listened to that DJ religiously.
Two: this hard-to-find video is of a song that is clearly pretty 'up there' on my personal all-time favorite songs. You might even find a line from this song in my "about me". Anyway, its a great jam, it has a great message. The band isn't really around anymore, and the video leaves something to be desired (still only like 43 views on YouTube), but as far as music goes - its top shelf baby.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
