You know how I know your gay?
Uh oh, I like coldplay.
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
Sunday, October 29, 2006
Madden Guide - Lesson 1
A good game to cover some important points about Madden. This game was never in doubt, and really wasn't close to the 20-13 score it ended up being. A late touchdown from QB Grossman (BUCS) to WR Jurevicius (BUCS) occured because of a blown coverage on a 3rd and 13.
Opening Remarks:
Some things you need to know before you begin. The following are absolutely required in order to become a decent player. These aren't really strategies, so much as the basics of winning that you will need to master in order to have a fighting chance. Remember, EVERY GAME, regardless of the talent level (rating system of the players) on the field, your CPU guys won't block as well as theirs, won't cover as well as theirs, and won't react to the ball as well as theirs, thats three basic tenets of playing the game on All-Madden.
The Basics:
1) You must learn to punt. Must not only be good at it, but must be willing to. If you aren't willing to, forget it and just stop because you will never win in All-Madden without punting. You will be down 30 points before you can blink.
2) You must never force a pass over the middle. Without doing this, YOU WILL STILL throw interceptions. I will go over this in a minute, but it will be hard enough throwing to WIDE OPEN guys in All-Madden, much less guys sort of covered, and even less than that, guys over the middle. Your first try at an All-Madden game will likely yield more than 12-14 INTERCEPTIONS by the other team. This is probably required to fully understand all of the stuff I will be describing to you, and you'll get exactly what I am talking about in the passing game once you see the computer behave yourself.
3) You must be willing to run a variety of plays. The computer will learn quickly and destroy your same old shit. There ARE certain tricks you can take advantage of that I will point out to you in the running game that will make it seem, at times, that you can just run the same play over and over. However, mastering 20-40 plays is really the only way you will score consistently.
4) You must learn to avoid play-action passes. Here's the thing: on All-Madden, very rarely will you actually be able to get off the play-fake, set up, and see your reciever icons come up before a DE or an LB is sacking your QB. The thing is, the CPU always knows what play you are running, and will "paddle-peek" so to speak -- in other words, they will usually call a good pass defense when you are passing, a decent run defense when you are running, and a good blitz when you are play-actioning. DOWN AND DISTANCE DOES affect its play calling, but its clearly only about 50-60 percent of its decision making process.
5) You must learn to knock down passes with DBs, and make the catch with your WR manually. This will require practice in the training camp mode. A good amount of it. You will need to learn when to hit L2 in order to knock down low, hard passes in man coverage, how to use L2 to knock down slow, floating passes to the outside, and how to use L2 to knock down the deep ball. It requires great timing, but luckily, it is the same basic skill as you have to learn in order to catch the ball manually with Y button on offense. The main tip: You have to learn to be the first person in the path of the ball to go up and get the pass, WHILE not going up to get the pass to early. Note that I said in the path of the ball, not the people the pass is intended to. If you go up to early, you will swat at nothing and jump at nothing, and the CPU will either intercept it or if they are on offense, they will catch it, and probably outrun everyone to the endzone. Its kind of intimidating. Don't worry though, there are certain things that will work to make it safer than it sounds.
To me, those 5 things are absolutely required. Without them, you're toast 100 percent of the time.
BUT back to today's game, and today's lessons.
Grossman was their QB, and in Madden he is a QB that will complete 80-90 percent of his passes for 250-350 yards in the game without pressure on him. You could play impecable coverage, but it wouldn't matter. His throws are too fast to react to many times, and often times you are better off NOT trying to swat down his passes if he is throwing to a WR one on one on the outside. You're actually better off letting them take the 8-10 yard catch, then hitting L2 after the catch is made with the CB next to the WR, which will make him do a controlled, sure tackle.
However, Deion Branch and Joe Jurevicius were their WRs - who are OKAY but not FAST - and therefore very controllable. FAST WRs with a dominating QB are the toughest to stop in All-Madden, because they will often beat man coverage deep (even 2 or 3 deep man) and they will routinely be open vs. zones.
So how to stop them? Remember the main rules. No. 1. Punt if you have to. No. 2, VARIETY- even on defense.
Now -- to expound.
We know that you need to put PRESSURE on Grossman. If you look at my stat line, he threw for 226 yards and 2 TDs, but he also was sacked 6 TIMES and lost the ball on downs twice. Also, we shut down a drive on the 5 yard line that could've tied the game in the 2nd quarter.
So Blitz? Yes, occasionally. BUT YOU NEED to learn how to get pressure with your front four.
Rule #1 - the diagrammed pass rush routes will work 2% of the time. You NEED to line audible, and do it routinely. With your linemen in a 4-3, lined up head up over their G and Ts, audible to a WIDE PASS RUSH, which will make both ends SPEED rush around and, and then DTs will take 3 technique speed rushes as well. On All-Madden, the biggest problem in rushing the passer is that when they get a chance to block man up, the OL will ALWAYS nullify your rush - you won't bull rush them, and they can bull rush you. This will work occasionally, and is a good idea on 1st and 10 and 2nd and short, because it is a decent way to pressure the pocket WHILE not totally giving up on the run.
THE MOST EFFECTIVE WAY TO RUSH THE PASSER in Madden, on All-Madden, is to only rush 4 men, audible your line to do wide speed rush, and ALSO presnap align your DTs to 3 techniques and your DE's to 7 techniques. This means that your DEs and DTs will spread wide pre-snap, and you will have NO one over the center, and no one over both A gaps(or 1 holes).
Finally, in these rushes, you have to TRUST your DE's, and NOT be one of them -- let the CPU handle it, and use your LBs to cover the pass. You need your own eyes back there, plus...and this is big...
ONLY be a blitzing LB or a DB, NEVER be a DL on All-Madden. You can really only use speed moves effectively, and the CPU will always direct the players at better speed angles on the line that you as a human can. Trust me on this.
Finally -- The blitz -- how and when?
Good times for it:
when they get inside your own 30. Zones and no rush = giving up a TD once this happens. 2nd and short = you will stuff the run, and its a time when the risk is worth the reward ifyou get to the QB 3rd and moderately long = note i said moderately. If its 3rd and 15+ its ACTUALLY BETTER to RUSH 4, play 3 deep man, and take your chances that you will tackle them before they get to the marker, because you will 75% of the time.
HOW TO BLITZ? Glad you asked. First, lets talk about what not to do.
Blitzing 8 -NEVER. Your guys invariably get in each others way - plus on All-Madden, simply running 8 guys at 6 blockers, though logic would say it couldn't not work, usually ends up having 6 guys getting blocked head up, and the other two blitzers two busy tryin gto get through traffic to actually get to the Qb in time, leading to you getting torched.
Blitzing one LB, and slanting the other linemen away from him - NEVER. Each man ends up getting manned up, and like i said, once you get manned up by an All-Madden OL, you are done, no pressure will come of it.
There's two types of Blitzees that can work:
One man, LB or DB, up the middle STUNTING AWAY from your DE or DT slant rushing, OR
Two men blitzing, if outside, then slanting the line towards the outside rusher - if inside, than slanting the linemen AWAY from the inside rusher.
Does that make sense? So for example, if you want to rush the WLB outside, then slant the WE and the WT towards the WLB, effectively making them speed rush and the OL on that side slide protect to the left - THEN, take the WLB and speed rush AROUND all of that. Chances are, you will beat the C (who will try to slide over and protect) and you will have a shot at the QB.
Practice all of this -- FOR NOW - Just try these rushes out, and don't even BE the CB once the ball is thrown, take your lumps and completions, and rely on sacks to stop them. As you get better at knocking down the ball, you will want to pressur ethe QB with the blitz, then switch guys after the ball is released, and learn to hit l2 at the right time to have your CB (usually in man coverage with blitzes) knock down the passes that are generally thrown slightly short of their intended target (when you blitz).
Anyway, as far as on offense, the Bucs have dominating up front people that will HUNT YOUR SCRAMBLING QB DOWN and MAUL him occasionally. So dont just run out of the pocket.
Tip#1: run on 1st and 10.
Tip#2: Motion away from playside, and watch the computer overcompensate.
Tip#3: use the juke key to juke your way outside, dont just sprint as fast as you can out there, because their LBs will disengage their blockers and tackle your ass for a lot shorter gain than if you are patient, hit juke when behind a lead blocker, which will then throw your HB to the open side of the play without allowing the CPU to pursue yet,then once the opening is in front of you, just sprint ahead and get what you can.
Tip#4: As for passing right now. Motion to check if its a zone or a man. If its a man to man, try quick outs by waiting for the wideout to break, throwing a BULLET to him and then once you release the ball, hitting Y to catch it on the intended WR as soon as possible. This, oddly enough, will get your wideout to catch the ball AND stop the CB from cutting in front and picking it. If you dont do that, the CB will cut in front and knock down/INT routinely. -- IF YOU are up against a zone, try quick slants to SE side of the field. The less traffic in front the better. Again, throw a bullet, switch to intended, hit Y to catch, hope for the best. We will talk about other passes later. Move the ball and take your points, sack the QB and punt when you have to. You might not win yet, but youll be close already.....
Game two coming soon....
Opening Remarks:
Some things you need to know before you begin. The following are absolutely required in order to become a decent player. These aren't really strategies, so much as the basics of winning that you will need to master in order to have a fighting chance. Remember, EVERY GAME, regardless of the talent level (rating system of the players) on the field, your CPU guys won't block as well as theirs, won't cover as well as theirs, and won't react to the ball as well as theirs, thats three basic tenets of playing the game on All-Madden.
The Basics:
1) You must learn to punt. Must not only be good at it, but must be willing to. If you aren't willing to, forget it and just stop because you will never win in All-Madden without punting. You will be down 30 points before you can blink.
2) You must never force a pass over the middle. Without doing this, YOU WILL STILL throw interceptions. I will go over this in a minute, but it will be hard enough throwing to WIDE OPEN guys in All-Madden, much less guys sort of covered, and even less than that, guys over the middle. Your first try at an All-Madden game will likely yield more than 12-14 INTERCEPTIONS by the other team. This is probably required to fully understand all of the stuff I will be describing to you, and you'll get exactly what I am talking about in the passing game once you see the computer behave yourself.
3) You must be willing to run a variety of plays. The computer will learn quickly and destroy your same old shit. There ARE certain tricks you can take advantage of that I will point out to you in the running game that will make it seem, at times, that you can just run the same play over and over. However, mastering 20-40 plays is really the only way you will score consistently.
4) You must learn to avoid play-action passes. Here's the thing: on All-Madden, very rarely will you actually be able to get off the play-fake, set up, and see your reciever icons come up before a DE or an LB is sacking your QB. The thing is, the CPU always knows what play you are running, and will "paddle-peek" so to speak -- in other words, they will usually call a good pass defense when you are passing, a decent run defense when you are running, and a good blitz when you are play-actioning. DOWN AND DISTANCE DOES affect its play calling, but its clearly only about 50-60 percent of its decision making process.
5) You must learn to knock down passes with DBs, and make the catch with your WR manually. This will require practice in the training camp mode. A good amount of it. You will need to learn when to hit L2 in order to knock down low, hard passes in man coverage, how to use L2 to knock down slow, floating passes to the outside, and how to use L2 to knock down the deep ball. It requires great timing, but luckily, it is the same basic skill as you have to learn in order to catch the ball manually with Y button on offense. The main tip: You have to learn to be the first person in the path of the ball to go up and get the pass, WHILE not going up to get the pass to early. Note that I said in the path of the ball, not the people the pass is intended to. If you go up to early, you will swat at nothing and jump at nothing, and the CPU will either intercept it or if they are on offense, they will catch it, and probably outrun everyone to the endzone. Its kind of intimidating. Don't worry though, there are certain things that will work to make it safer than it sounds.
To me, those 5 things are absolutely required. Without them, you're toast 100 percent of the time.
BUT back to today's game, and today's lessons.
Grossman was their QB, and in Madden he is a QB that will complete 80-90 percent of his passes for 250-350 yards in the game without pressure on him. You could play impecable coverage, but it wouldn't matter. His throws are too fast to react to many times, and often times you are better off NOT trying to swat down his passes if he is throwing to a WR one on one on the outside. You're actually better off letting them take the 8-10 yard catch, then hitting L2 after the catch is made with the CB next to the WR, which will make him do a controlled, sure tackle.
However, Deion Branch and Joe Jurevicius were their WRs - who are OKAY but not FAST - and therefore very controllable. FAST WRs with a dominating QB are the toughest to stop in All-Madden, because they will often beat man coverage deep (even 2 or 3 deep man) and they will routinely be open vs. zones.
So how to stop them? Remember the main rules. No. 1. Punt if you have to. No. 2, VARIETY- even on defense.
Now -- to expound.
We know that you need to put PRESSURE on Grossman. If you look at my stat line, he threw for 226 yards and 2 TDs, but he also was sacked 6 TIMES and lost the ball on downs twice. Also, we shut down a drive on the 5 yard line that could've tied the game in the 2nd quarter.
So Blitz? Yes, occasionally. BUT YOU NEED to learn how to get pressure with your front four.
Rule #1 - the diagrammed pass rush routes will work 2% of the time. You NEED to line audible, and do it routinely. With your linemen in a 4-3, lined up head up over their G and Ts, audible to a WIDE PASS RUSH, which will make both ends SPEED rush around and, and then DTs will take 3 technique speed rushes as well. On All-Madden, the biggest problem in rushing the passer is that when they get a chance to block man up, the OL will ALWAYS nullify your rush - you won't bull rush them, and they can bull rush you. This will work occasionally, and is a good idea on 1st and 10 and 2nd and short, because it is a decent way to pressure the pocket WHILE not totally giving up on the run.
THE MOST EFFECTIVE WAY TO RUSH THE PASSER in Madden, on All-Madden, is to only rush 4 men, audible your line to do wide speed rush, and ALSO presnap align your DTs to 3 techniques and your DE's to 7 techniques. This means that your DEs and DTs will spread wide pre-snap, and you will have NO one over the center, and no one over both A gaps(or 1 holes).
Finally, in these rushes, you have to TRUST your DE's, and NOT be one of them -- let the CPU handle it, and use your LBs to cover the pass. You need your own eyes back there, plus...and this is big...
ONLY be a blitzing LB or a DB, NEVER be a DL on All-Madden. You can really only use speed moves effectively, and the CPU will always direct the players at better speed angles on the line that you as a human can. Trust me on this.
Finally -- The blitz -- how and when?
Good times for it:
when they get inside your own 30. Zones and no rush = giving up a TD once this happens. 2nd and short = you will stuff the run, and its a time when the risk is worth the reward ifyou get to the QB 3rd and moderately long = note i said moderately. If its 3rd and 15+ its ACTUALLY BETTER to RUSH 4, play 3 deep man, and take your chances that you will tackle them before they get to the marker, because you will 75% of the time.
HOW TO BLITZ? Glad you asked. First, lets talk about what not to do.
Blitzing 8 -NEVER. Your guys invariably get in each others way - plus on All-Madden, simply running 8 guys at 6 blockers, though logic would say it couldn't not work, usually ends up having 6 guys getting blocked head up, and the other two blitzers two busy tryin gto get through traffic to actually get to the Qb in time, leading to you getting torched.
Blitzing one LB, and slanting the other linemen away from him - NEVER. Each man ends up getting manned up, and like i said, once you get manned up by an All-Madden OL, you are done, no pressure will come of it.
There's two types of Blitzees that can work:
One man, LB or DB, up the middle STUNTING AWAY from your DE or DT slant rushing, OR
Two men blitzing, if outside, then slanting the line towards the outside rusher - if inside, than slanting the linemen AWAY from the inside rusher.
Does that make sense? So for example, if you want to rush the WLB outside, then slant the WE and the WT towards the WLB, effectively making them speed rush and the OL on that side slide protect to the left - THEN, take the WLB and speed rush AROUND all of that. Chances are, you will beat the C (who will try to slide over and protect) and you will have a shot at the QB.
Practice all of this -- FOR NOW - Just try these rushes out, and don't even BE the CB once the ball is thrown, take your lumps and completions, and rely on sacks to stop them. As you get better at knocking down the ball, you will want to pressur ethe QB with the blitz, then switch guys after the ball is released, and learn to hit l2 at the right time to have your CB (usually in man coverage with blitzes) knock down the passes that are generally thrown slightly short of their intended target (when you blitz).
Anyway, as far as on offense, the Bucs have dominating up front people that will HUNT YOUR SCRAMBLING QB DOWN and MAUL him occasionally. So dont just run out of the pocket.
Tip#1: run on 1st and 10.
Tip#2: Motion away from playside, and watch the computer overcompensate.
Tip#3: use the juke key to juke your way outside, dont just sprint as fast as you can out there, because their LBs will disengage their blockers and tackle your ass for a lot shorter gain than if you are patient, hit juke when behind a lead blocker, which will then throw your HB to the open side of the play without allowing the CPU to pursue yet,then once the opening is in front of you, just sprint ahead and get what you can.
Tip#4: As for passing right now. Motion to check if its a zone or a man. If its a man to man, try quick outs by waiting for the wideout to break, throwing a BULLET to him and then once you release the ball, hitting Y to catch it on the intended WR as soon as possible. This, oddly enough, will get your wideout to catch the ball AND stop the CB from cutting in front and picking it. If you dont do that, the CB will cut in front and knock down/INT routinely. -- IF YOU are up against a zone, try quick slants to SE side of the field. The less traffic in front the better. Again, throw a bullet, switch to intended, hit Y to catch, hope for the best. We will talk about other passes later. Move the ball and take your points, sack the QB and punt when you have to. You might not win yet, but youll be close already.....
Game two coming soon....
Friday, October 27, 2006
October 27th - Videos of the Week
Today's weekly collection is a brief break from Borat. Don't worry, he'll be back. This group includes a tribute to Chuck Norris, a little Madden fun, a rediculous display of human ability, and probably one of the funniest 10 minute clips of your life.
We really need to get as creative with TV as they are in Japan.
Lemme know what you all think.
Peace.
#6: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_F7VCMvTE9g - A Madden 2007 glitch of the week
#5: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f5KNB0d6M8s - Ocho Cinco!
#4: http://youtube.com/watch?v=2FaBVHPVfWQ - Probably The coolest thing youll ever watch
#3: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7OW-EFN4pkY&NR - The premise of the video is hilarious enough, but the best part is the helmet and the part at the VERY END. Awesome.
#2: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GuJ7gxpiNvE&NR - What's luckier, this, or winning the lottery?
#1: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-SXIRZkGD8k&mode=related&search= - if you watch one more video in your whole life, watch this
We really need to get as creative with TV as they are in Japan.
Lemme know what you all think.
Peace.
#6: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_F7VCMvTE9g - A Madden 2007 glitch of the week
#5: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f5KNB0d6M8s - Ocho Cinco!
#4: http://youtube.com/watch?v=2FaBVHPVfWQ - Probably The coolest thing youll ever watch
#3: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7OW-EFN4pkY&NR - The premise of the video is hilarious enough, but the best part is the helmet and the part at the VERY END. Awesome.
#2: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GuJ7gxpiNvE&NR - What's luckier, this, or winning the lottery?
#1: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-SXIRZkGD8k&mode=related&search= - if you watch one more video in your whole life, watch this
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
XBOX Madden Strategy Guide, Versions 2005-2007
Without my poker sanctuary, life has turned back to simpler times.
Madden 2005 times in fact.
It should be known that I have never owned 2007 or 2006 versions of Xbox Madden, primarily for two reasons:
1. the QB vision feature, the main addition to 2006-07 versions, is greatly dismissed by many in human v. human play, and it doesn't really add a great deal of skill to the game other than mastering one more key. Bad QBs just threw bad passes in the old verisions, good QBs threw better ones. The vision feature really isn't that cool.
2. The 2005 version came as close to perfecting Xbox football simulation as possible. It was the first year that they mastered defensive controls and CPU A.I. (to as much a degree as they can allow I guess).
Now, I have never entered a Madden "Bowl" or the official tournament -- although I am quite certain that I could win it given a couple of weeks to re-strategize. My biggest problem with those tournaments?
They are typically always played with game difficulty set on Rookie or the second level (can't even remember the name), rendering the CPU defensive abilities for both teams almost completely useless.
But its HUMAN v. HUMAN you say! It doesn't really matter right?
Well, actually....it greatly affects how well all the other guys on the field perform. The ones you can't always control.
Great for scoring a lot of points, and great for using the same tactics as you could use when playing Super TecmoBowl for NES.
Not much for realism, or challenge -- IMHO.
So anyway, I believe this has lead to a lot of people around who think they are really good at Madden....yikes. But they aren't.
I've known people who claim to be the best they know, yet, have never a) had to EVER control the reciever for catching the pass, b) have ever had to worry about the CPU pass rush, c) throw late over the middle, past DL and LBs, all of the time without repurcussion d) have never been anyone on the defense other than the DL, 5) have never knocked down a pass, 6) have never played their responsibility in a zone coverage scheme, 7) have never modified plays pre-snap 8)....
could go on.
So anyway, I am embarking on my first ever full season of Madden 2005 on All-Madden, all the way through, no resets, with my 2008 Chicago Bears, fresh off the SuperBowl victory on All-Pro level.
I am currently 7-1, leading the division by a healthy 3 games.
Over the next two weeks, I will start take notes of the games this season, and try to establish a couple of important pointers for Madden Players each and every game. There are a lot of different things you should know.
But in the end, hopefully I can spread my nerdly knowledge to many of you - and after some practice, maybe I can actually find a good opponent to play.
(NOTE -- I really can't claim that all of these tactics would work for NCAA 2005 - 07 players. I've never gotten into that game, mainly because you can QB sneak every time on the highest level for 10-15 yards a pop with a moose playing QB, and because you can just throw the ball up in the air like an air balloon and no one knocks it down, in fact, your reciever, without aiding him, catches it most of the time -- oh, and when you try to knock down passes with DBs in that game, they dont even pretend to try or have even an idea of what that button is supposed to do -- that would explain why some of you who are used to NCAA Football were confused when I talked about that -- its technically something supposed to be available in that game, but none of the players actually respond to that key)
I am pretty sure I will hear about this from an NCAA lover. I know many. PS - you guys, lets start an NCAA 2007 season, I am willing to take my lumps for a few games.
LESSON ONE - WEEK 11 GAME (8-1) VS. BUCS (5-4)
Madden 2005 times in fact.
It should be known that I have never owned 2007 or 2006 versions of Xbox Madden, primarily for two reasons:
1. the QB vision feature, the main addition to 2006-07 versions, is greatly dismissed by many in human v. human play, and it doesn't really add a great deal of skill to the game other than mastering one more key. Bad QBs just threw bad passes in the old verisions, good QBs threw better ones. The vision feature really isn't that cool.
2. The 2005 version came as close to perfecting Xbox football simulation as possible. It was the first year that they mastered defensive controls and CPU A.I. (to as much a degree as they can allow I guess).
Now, I have never entered a Madden "Bowl" or the official tournament -- although I am quite certain that I could win it given a couple of weeks to re-strategize. My biggest problem with those tournaments?
They are typically always played with game difficulty set on Rookie or the second level (can't even remember the name), rendering the CPU defensive abilities for both teams almost completely useless.
But its HUMAN v. HUMAN you say! It doesn't really matter right?
Well, actually....it greatly affects how well all the other guys on the field perform. The ones you can't always control.
Great for scoring a lot of points, and great for using the same tactics as you could use when playing Super TecmoBowl for NES.
Not much for realism, or challenge -- IMHO.
So anyway, I believe this has lead to a lot of people around who think they are really good at Madden....yikes. But they aren't.
I've known people who claim to be the best they know, yet, have never a) had to EVER control the reciever for catching the pass, b) have ever had to worry about the CPU pass rush, c) throw late over the middle, past DL and LBs, all of the time without repurcussion d) have never been anyone on the defense other than the DL, 5) have never knocked down a pass, 6) have never played their responsibility in a zone coverage scheme, 7) have never modified plays pre-snap 8)....
could go on.
So anyway, I am embarking on my first ever full season of Madden 2005 on All-Madden, all the way through, no resets, with my 2008 Chicago Bears, fresh off the SuperBowl victory on All-Pro level.
I am currently 7-1, leading the division by a healthy 3 games.
Over the next two weeks, I will start take notes of the games this season, and try to establish a couple of important pointers for Madden Players each and every game. There are a lot of different things you should know.
But in the end, hopefully I can spread my nerdly knowledge to many of you - and after some practice, maybe I can actually find a good opponent to play.
(NOTE -- I really can't claim that all of these tactics would work for NCAA 2005 - 07 players. I've never gotten into that game, mainly because you can QB sneak every time on the highest level for 10-15 yards a pop with a moose playing QB, and because you can just throw the ball up in the air like an air balloon and no one knocks it down, in fact, your reciever, without aiding him, catches it most of the time -- oh, and when you try to knock down passes with DBs in that game, they dont even pretend to try or have even an idea of what that button is supposed to do -- that would explain why some of you who are used to NCAA Football were confused when I talked about that -- its technically something supposed to be available in that game, but none of the players actually respond to that key)
I am pretty sure I will hear about this from an NCAA lover. I know many. PS - you guys, lets start an NCAA 2007 season, I am willing to take my lumps for a few games.
LESSON ONE - WEEK 11 GAME (8-1) VS. BUCS (5-4)
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
Sunday, October 22, 2006
Breaking News!
A 30 minute segment from A Dutch talk show.
You look?
http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xivb1_borat-bij-jensen
You look?
http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xivb1_borat-bij-jensen
Kazak Chamber of Commerce Memo
This is a great contribution from a friend. Today's post on the "13 days of Borat" impromptu blog tribute includes another real-life news story. I just want to thank this government for making my comedic life complete. Can it really be this good? The fact that this is real is definitely a gift from God.
God bless comedy.
Here it is. You'll cry with joy.
God bless comedy.
Here it is. You'll cry with joy.
Saturday, October 21, 2006
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
Borat - Sexytime Explosion
Nothing really brightens my day quite like the breathless anticipation I feel when I think about seeing the Borat movie.
For those of you who are not familiar with the TV star from Kazak, please, acquaint yourself with his latest legal battle.
Has humor ever been so life-alteringly good that the comedian has actually been sued by an entire people, and threatened with military force from an entire nation? And has a comedian ever actually created a potentially hostile situation between rival nations before - all the while using their sovereign misconceptions as fuel for the joke?
November 3rd will be the best day of the year. And if you know me, you better be at the theatre with me or it might come to blows.
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
A Team of Destiny?
And I had to go open my mouth about how sports isn't real news.
You didn't have to be a Bears fan, a Cards fan, or even more than a casual sports observer to not notice how rediculous last night's MNF game was, and how miraculous it was that the Bears won.
Eric Zorn of the Chicago Tribune beat me to it, but I thought it would be interesting to get a quick take on this game from three perspectives: the Chicago angle, the Arizona angle, and the "national media" angle...
For those of you who DIDN'T the game or don't care about football, here is what happened in a nutshell:
Statistically, the Cardinals dominated the Bears in many aspects of Monday's 24-23 loss:
Category Cardinals Bears
First downs 17 9
Total yards 286 168
Possession time 39:43 20:17
Turnovers forced 6 2
No offensive touchdowns scored by the Bears the whole game. Cardinals up by 20 points, with the ball, on the last play of the 3rd quarter.
To read exactly what happened (if you beleive what you are reading), check out the facts in Chicago's Mike Downey article.
The Bears moved onto 6-0, broke many NFL records in futility along the way, and the Cardinals went to 1-5, in a weird way doing much, much worse.
And not just because they lost. But because they caused one of those events that makes you seriously consider the intangible, the fantastical, and the hands of fate. It went to confirm the feeling and the notion of many people that "of course the Cardinals blew it, the Cardinals are forever doomed."
In the opposite way, it went to fuel the same type of conclusions on the other side -- "the Bears somehow won this game, they MUST be a team of destiny."
When reality is too rediculous to be believed, we often fall for such things. We think God or a mystic power is punishing a team, a person, a people, or whatever -- and God or another power is annointing another team, person, a people, or whatever. We place all credit or blame on something that seems to be obvious, seems to be the best solution to our confusion, but in reality....
is an illusion. The real reasons the Cardinals lost the game? Couldn't run out the clock, because they couldn't run the ball -- they blew assignments on the line, and they can't cover a punt. Looking for the real reason the Cardinals have lost historically?
Dan Bickley says it best, at the very end of his article out of Arizona.
Why did the Bears win? Lucky bounces, yes. More importantly, good timing and a better team, top to bottom. The Bears on their worst day still had enough against a worse team on a good day.
I am not trying to say there are no such thing as miracles. I am also not denying that there are things in the world that cannot be explained logically.
And I'm not saying that the world of sports isn't important. It can inspire people to do things they never thought possible - can give people emotions they've never felt before. Sporting events captivate us and entertain us in a way that other things cannot: they let us enjoy a daily drama, cheer and have fun, boo and be angry, and let us relax about life and just be fans.
But God does not care who wins. Curses are not held over professional sports franchises or their imagined communities of supporters. Fate is not taunting the Arizona Cardinals. The Bears of this year are no more a team of destiny than the '03 Cubs were "cursed" by a goat or by Steve Bartman.
The Bears might not be good enough to win the SuperBowl, or they might be. Clearly, they, like every other team in the NFL, will need to play well, and need to be a little lucky. The Cards are definitely good enough to play with anyone in the NFL, and they are not leaps and bounds behind the notion of being a respectable team.
Games like last night's make that pretty hard to see, though.
You didn't have to be a Bears fan, a Cards fan, or even more than a casual sports observer to not notice how rediculous last night's MNF game was, and how miraculous it was that the Bears won.
Eric Zorn of the Chicago Tribune beat me to it, but I thought it would be interesting to get a quick take on this game from three perspectives: the Chicago angle, the Arizona angle, and the "national media" angle...
For those of you who DIDN'T the game or don't care about football, here is what happened in a nutshell:
Statistically, the Cardinals dominated the Bears in many aspects of Monday's 24-23 loss:
Category Cardinals Bears
First downs 17 9
Total yards 286 168
Possession time 39:43 20:17
Turnovers forced 6 2
No offensive touchdowns scored by the Bears the whole game. Cardinals up by 20 points, with the ball, on the last play of the 3rd quarter.
To read exactly what happened (if you beleive what you are reading), check out the facts in Chicago's Mike Downey article.
The Bears moved onto 6-0, broke many NFL records in futility along the way, and the Cardinals went to 1-5, in a weird way doing much, much worse.
And not just because they lost. But because they caused one of those events that makes you seriously consider the intangible, the fantastical, and the hands of fate. It went to confirm the feeling and the notion of many people that "of course the Cardinals blew it, the Cardinals are forever doomed."
In the opposite way, it went to fuel the same type of conclusions on the other side -- "the Bears somehow won this game, they MUST be a team of destiny."
When reality is too rediculous to be believed, we often fall for such things. We think God or a mystic power is punishing a team, a person, a people, or whatever -- and God or another power is annointing another team, person, a people, or whatever. We place all credit or blame on something that seems to be obvious, seems to be the best solution to our confusion, but in reality....
is an illusion. The real reasons the Cardinals lost the game? Couldn't run out the clock, because they couldn't run the ball -- they blew assignments on the line, and they can't cover a punt. Looking for the real reason the Cardinals have lost historically?
Dan Bickley says it best, at the very end of his article out of Arizona.
Why did the Bears win? Lucky bounces, yes. More importantly, good timing and a better team, top to bottom. The Bears on their worst day still had enough against a worse team on a good day.
I am not trying to say there are no such thing as miracles. I am also not denying that there are things in the world that cannot be explained logically.
And I'm not saying that the world of sports isn't important. It can inspire people to do things they never thought possible - can give people emotions they've never felt before. Sporting events captivate us and entertain us in a way that other things cannot: they let us enjoy a daily drama, cheer and have fun, boo and be angry, and let us relax about life and just be fans.
But God does not care who wins. Curses are not held over professional sports franchises or their imagined communities of supporters. Fate is not taunting the Arizona Cardinals. The Bears of this year are no more a team of destiny than the '03 Cubs were "cursed" by a goat or by Steve Bartman.
The Bears might not be good enough to win the SuperBowl, or they might be. Clearly, they, like every other team in the NFL, will need to play well, and need to be a little lucky. The Cards are definitely good enough to play with anyone in the NFL, and they are not leaps and bounds behind the notion of being a respectable team.
Games like last night's make that pretty hard to see, though.
Monday, October 16, 2006
Bears pummeling to ensue: slow news day saved.
I hate saying that the two biggest stories in the news today actually came from the world of sports, which in and of itself is great, but in the context of "sports news", is often times nothing more than contrived drivel. Today, the Bears are on MNF and should dismantle a hapless Arizona Cardinals team. News item #1. Also, today the Cubs confirmed the signing of Lou Pinella as their new manager for the 07 season. News item #2. A particular quote from a known analyst in baseball should get your attention if you are a sports fan, in regards to predictions on how the Cubs will do under this new skipper.
The only other thing I saw of any note at all today was a random posting on a website concerning getting out of bad cell phone contracts. Its a Wiki-post, so it could be all complete nonsense, but the part on saying you are moving to a remote location I have heard works wonders. I am not only involved in a crappy cell phone contract, but more importantly, my phone and the service it gets is rediculous. I find it funny that they try to phase out phones that are over 9-10 months old by screwing with your reception to try to get you to buy a new phone. Its an industry that has totally taken over the world and would've dominated every man woman and child's life and pocketbook regardless, why do they feel the need to squeeze every last penny out of people when all they have to do is keep people happy and people will provide them with a steady stream of rediculous profits for a long time to come? So goes it, though. Feel free to share your cell phone horror stories here.
The only other thing I saw of any note at all today was a random posting on a website concerning getting out of bad cell phone contracts. Its a Wiki-post, so it could be all complete nonsense, but the part on saying you are moving to a remote location I have heard works wonders. I am not only involved in a crappy cell phone contract, but more importantly, my phone and the service it gets is rediculous. I find it funny that they try to phase out phones that are over 9-10 months old by screwing with your reception to try to get you to buy a new phone. Its an industry that has totally taken over the world and would've dominated every man woman and child's life and pocketbook regardless, why do they feel the need to squeeze every last penny out of people when all they have to do is keep people happy and people will provide them with a steady stream of rediculous profits for a long time to come? So goes it, though. Feel free to share your cell phone horror stories here.
Sunday, October 15, 2006
Legislation Gone Wrong - Another Feather in the Cap of a Useless Congress
I always knew Friday the 13th meant strange and scary things were about to happen.
This year is no different.
This past Friday, the US officially passed a law making playing poker online (for money) illegal.
My Xbox will be re-introduced to me more than ever now...
As if my personal feelings on this issue aren't clear already, let me give you a quick tour of my personal experience.
I played poker online for money. I have been doing so for a number of years. It wasn't illegal, it wasn't against my religion, and quite frankly, it was a pretty harmless way to pass a few hours or earn a little money to go out on the weekends with. I never gambled with anything important - ten, twenty dollars was usually what I played with, and it was usually what I ended up winning or losing at the end of the day. It beat blowing my money on other things, and for the entertainment value, it was the only one I could think of that I could interact with new people from the comfort of my room after a long day of being a worker, being a student, whatever.
The game particularly endeared me when college ended. I was at a particular crossroads, where the MLB draft didn't work out for me as planned, I had no plane ticket to a random city to play ball in, I was graduated but I had no job yet, and I knew I wanted to live in Chicago. Problem was, I was still in Ann Arbor. I had NO money. Really, completely none. It all went towards my education up until that point.
My choices included:
-sitting there with no money, looking for work in Ann Arbor, and having to find someplace to stay once my lease ended (about a month later).
-getting home somehow, living with my grandparents, and pursuing much more permanent positions in the place I wanted to be.
So in my quest to figure out how I would accept the second choice, I sat on my computer and played poker to take my mind off of things. I ended up winning. And winning a pretty considerable amount of money for me at the time, over the course of 2 weeks. I started shopping for cars online ---
I found something that I could buy - with the money I won with online poker.
1100 dollars later, I was in a '90 Cutlass Cierra, a car I should've probably never purchased for reasons of health and safety, but nonetheless, I got it, drove home to Chicago, and life has been a wonderful journey ever since.
With work, social life stuff, and other pursuits, I didn't have a lot of chances to play much online poker anymore. Once or twice a week was frequent, and a couple of times a month was typical.
It was fun, it was harmless, and most of all, it let me tell some funny stories to my friends.
However, now this is all gone (at least for now). I am not sure if it is a question of the government trying to dictate our morality ( btw how could this be an immoral behavior? - I can think of a lot worse things in life that are routinely celebrated in our culture) , trying to enforce its rules on "gambling" regulations (which seems ridiculous, in light of almost every 'riverboat' casino now being brought to land, chicago's push for its own casino, and the rules of Indian casinos being about as loose as loose can be), or an issue in a larger economic agenda (ding ding ding?!) - but I cannot help but think that this is sketchy legislation at best.
Think about this:
pharmaceutical companies with virtual monopolies on specific prescription drugs will continue to sell them at extremely inflated prices - allowing them to pay entry-level employee's upwards of 80,000 a year or more, and near-bankrupting elderly people throughout the country and forcing companies to scale back retirement and health benefits at an alarming rate - and no important legislation controlling the prices of these products, sometimes necessary for life itself, has gotten close to being passed through our Congress. Who benefits from this? Certain American companies.
In a country built upon the backs of people who didn't belong here, clamor is being heard from certain political entities and members of our government (and sadly, our populace), that we need to close our borders to illegal immigrants AND ARM them more than they already are. Nevermind the fact that the only jobs these people are taking when they come over are the jobs that no one wants, the jobs that actually benefit American companies because these workers will take substandard wages, no-no, we are hell-bent on keeping these people out. Why? I see two reasons: one, a lot of people are too dumb and too lazy to understand and/or accept that illegal immigrants aren't taking anything from current citizens, unless you are the type that aspires to be the pseudo-servants of our society - and, people are just plain afraid of learning/dealing with new cultures aka racist, and two: arming the borders and increasing the manpower to enforce these laws means even MORE government spending on the military than we are already, which is almost impossible. Where does all that money go? To Certain AMERICAN companies.
On this topic, we are currently spending a ridiculous amount of money on a war that originally centered on one man, and mushroomed into a all-out attempt at forcing an American model on a people of whom a significant portion of want nothing to do with. Do I think that is smart? ON our part, NOOOO. On their part? No. I think that a free democracy is a great, great thing -- but try as we might, sometimes you have to let countries figure it out on their own. We aren't forcing China to become capitalist anytime soon, why are we trying so hard right now? Well, hmmm lets see. Who benefits from military spending out the asshole? Parents of American soldiers? No no no. Certain American Companies? YES YES YES.
So anyway, while we spend too much on a war we may never win, we allow certain aspects of our society to run wild with exploitation in certain sectors, and we focus on changing the entire attitude that our country was built on, know that we are keeping your internet safe from 10 dollar poker games, and people blowing a little steam and a few bucks here or there playing a card game that they will probably play with their friends on the weekend sometime now anyway. Seem a little ridiculous? Well, think of it in terms of this -- Can American companies profit off of internet poker? Its has been (for a while now) illegal for an American company to host such a site, therefore these sites (like Partypoker, Paradise Poker..etc) are profiting companies overseas or in the Caribbean. Hmmmm, not profiting certain American companies, law gets passed to regulate.
Makes you think?
Friday the 13th -- its a lot scarier than full moons and werewolves.
PS - A LONE REBEL FIGHTS ON (-; -- Everything is up to interpretation I guess..
This year is no different.
This past Friday, the US officially passed a law making playing poker online (for money) illegal.
My Xbox will be re-introduced to me more than ever now...
As if my personal feelings on this issue aren't clear already, let me give you a quick tour of my personal experience.
I played poker online for money. I have been doing so for a number of years. It wasn't illegal, it wasn't against my religion, and quite frankly, it was a pretty harmless way to pass a few hours or earn a little money to go out on the weekends with. I never gambled with anything important - ten, twenty dollars was usually what I played with, and it was usually what I ended up winning or losing at the end of the day. It beat blowing my money on other things, and for the entertainment value, it was the only one I could think of that I could interact with new people from the comfort of my room after a long day of being a worker, being a student, whatever.
The game particularly endeared me when college ended. I was at a particular crossroads, where the MLB draft didn't work out for me as planned, I had no plane ticket to a random city to play ball in, I was graduated but I had no job yet, and I knew I wanted to live in Chicago. Problem was, I was still in Ann Arbor. I had NO money. Really, completely none. It all went towards my education up until that point.
My choices included:
-sitting there with no money, looking for work in Ann Arbor, and having to find someplace to stay once my lease ended (about a month later).
-getting home somehow, living with my grandparents, and pursuing much more permanent positions in the place I wanted to be.
So in my quest to figure out how I would accept the second choice, I sat on my computer and played poker to take my mind off of things. I ended up winning. And winning a pretty considerable amount of money for me at the time, over the course of 2 weeks. I started shopping for cars online ---
I found something that I could buy - with the money I won with online poker.
1100 dollars later, I was in a '90 Cutlass Cierra, a car I should've probably never purchased for reasons of health and safety, but nonetheless, I got it, drove home to Chicago, and life has been a wonderful journey ever since.
With work, social life stuff, and other pursuits, I didn't have a lot of chances to play much online poker anymore. Once or twice a week was frequent, and a couple of times a month was typical.
It was fun, it was harmless, and most of all, it let me tell some funny stories to my friends.
However, now this is all gone (at least for now). I am not sure if it is a question of the government trying to dictate our morality ( btw how could this be an immoral behavior? - I can think of a lot worse things in life that are routinely celebrated in our culture) , trying to enforce its rules on "gambling" regulations (which seems ridiculous, in light of almost every 'riverboat' casino now being brought to land, chicago's push for its own casino, and the rules of Indian casinos being about as loose as loose can be), or an issue in a larger economic agenda (ding ding ding?!) - but I cannot help but think that this is sketchy legislation at best.
Think about this:
pharmaceutical companies with virtual monopolies on specific prescription drugs will continue to sell them at extremely inflated prices - allowing them to pay entry-level employee's upwards of 80,000 a year or more, and near-bankrupting elderly people throughout the country and forcing companies to scale back retirement and health benefits at an alarming rate - and no important legislation controlling the prices of these products, sometimes necessary for life itself, has gotten close to being passed through our Congress. Who benefits from this? Certain American companies.
In a country built upon the backs of people who didn't belong here, clamor is being heard from certain political entities and members of our government (and sadly, our populace), that we need to close our borders to illegal immigrants AND ARM them more than they already are. Nevermind the fact that the only jobs these people are taking when they come over are the jobs that no one wants, the jobs that actually benefit American companies because these workers will take substandard wages, no-no, we are hell-bent on keeping these people out. Why? I see two reasons: one, a lot of people are too dumb and too lazy to understand and/or accept that illegal immigrants aren't taking anything from current citizens, unless you are the type that aspires to be the pseudo-servants of our society - and, people are just plain afraid of learning/dealing with new cultures aka racist, and two: arming the borders and increasing the manpower to enforce these laws means even MORE government spending on the military than we are already, which is almost impossible. Where does all that money go? To Certain AMERICAN companies.
On this topic, we are currently spending a ridiculous amount of money on a war that originally centered on one man, and mushroomed into a all-out attempt at forcing an American model on a people of whom a significant portion of want nothing to do with. Do I think that is smart? ON our part, NOOOO. On their part? No. I think that a free democracy is a great, great thing -- but try as we might, sometimes you have to let countries figure it out on their own. We aren't forcing China to become capitalist anytime soon, why are we trying so hard right now? Well, hmmm lets see. Who benefits from military spending out the asshole? Parents of American soldiers? No no no. Certain American Companies? YES YES YES.
So anyway, while we spend too much on a war we may never win, we allow certain aspects of our society to run wild with exploitation in certain sectors, and we focus on changing the entire attitude that our country was built on, know that we are keeping your internet safe from 10 dollar poker games, and people blowing a little steam and a few bucks here or there playing a card game that they will probably play with their friends on the weekend sometime now anyway. Seem a little ridiculous? Well, think of it in terms of this -- Can American companies profit off of internet poker? Its has been (for a while now) illegal for an American company to host such a site, therefore these sites (like Partypoker, Paradise Poker..etc) are profiting companies overseas or in the Caribbean. Hmmmm, not profiting certain American companies, law gets passed to regulate.
Makes you think?
Friday the 13th -- its a lot scarier than full moons and werewolves.
PS - A LONE REBEL FIGHTS ON (-; -- Everything is up to interpretation I guess..
Saturday, October 14, 2006
FROM THE ARCHIVES - September 3rd
Sunday, September 03, 2006
The greatest .19 ever, Robin Yount
My apologies beforehand to Bill Simmons, because he just got done writing about a trip to Wisconsin and that included a Brewer game:
So I want to share this experience with everyone who hasnt seen it for themselves firsthand. A Milwaukee Brewer game is possibly the absolute holy land of tailgating. Where else on earth can you find 20000 people tailgating hours and hours before A BASEBALL GAME. Granted, Ive sort od tailgated before some other events, Sox, Cubs...minimally --- and usually I was one of like a couple hundred peoples in that regard. These people tailgate like its a Michigan Football game before a BREWERS GAME. Its just beautiful.
After walking through rows and rows of tailgates, we eventually got to our "standing room" seats that were sweet ass -- behind the left field fair pole - and we also got our Robin Yount bobble heads. For those of you who dont know who Robin Yount is, he is like part baseball hero, part chuck norris. He's southern pride meets Cal Ripken. In other words, he is a perfect folk hero - the best part is, the early 80s brewers were good, but not good enough to the point of being legendary - so he always gets passed over as great players of his era - despite being a hall of famer.
Anyway, we (JP Stevo JB) made the journey up to this mecca
I got the rookie jersey bobble head - there were 3 kinds. I was dying to get the powder blue one, and they were the "limted edition" ones- and it became apparent that 44000 people came to a meaningless Brewers game because of the bobbleheads. So, I enjoyed the rest of the game from my seats, chatting with a cute little 1 year old toddler in front of me, either playing hide and seek with him, or batting around a giant inflatable baseball for innings ata time. Thats another great thing I noticed - the ushers dont run to steal the bouncing balls like they do at cubs sox games. These guys encouraged it. Our section actually played with the ball for 3 innings, until we lost it over the edge into the lower deck -- at which point a lone soldier went into their section and reclaimed the ball and brought it back up. How sweet is that.
Oh - and then there was the drunk frat guy behind us who was pretty cool - and pretty drunk - and the big girl next to me. I dont have it in me to ruin someone's meaningless good time by yelling at someone for putting their hands all over me during the course of a sporting event. but let me just say this -- its once again proven: big girls love me. They absolutely cannot get enough of me.
Another favorite thing to do this week is to find another funny way my elbow makes me look like an alien. IF you roll your arms inward, like pointg your elbows away from your body, then straighten your arms, thats probably where it looks the funniest. The arm literally not only cant get straight, it can barely get past 45 degrees.
BACK to the Brewers thing -- this is another thing I love about these games: NO ONE hates the brewers. Its just not possible. No one does! Find someone who HATES the brewers, and Ill give you 50 bucks cash. I saw cubs, brewers, sox, yankees, red sox, marlins, braves, and astros fans at this game. If you asked any of them, they would all say "yeaah, i kinda like the brewers!" Really, i think it could be a unifying force nationally - now all we need to do is convert this energy into full fledged fandom. FACT: They have drawn over 2 MILLION in fans this year at that park already, which is INSANE for a team under 500 and not very good. THATS CUBS FANS insane. I think its taking on a whole new meaning to "wrigley north", no?
FROM THE ARCHIVES - August 31st.
Summing up a great day.
Ok, today I completely figured out my golf swing, accomplished more at work than 15 of my co-workers combined, and found a great polo shirt at target. what a day. the perfect cap to it, came at the end of the tonight as i got home from Public House...
(the following conversation happened at 11:12pm on thursday evening with *****)
******: yo tell me you are watching this tennis
PAbat623: ah man no hold on
******: very few times will you ever hear me say that but this is ridiculous
******: its a rock concert taking place on a tennis court
PAbat623: jesus what channel
******: USAA
******: USA
PAbat623: crazy
******: they have been this loud for every point the last 30 minutes ive been watching
PAbat623: who knew andre aggasi is the country's favorite hero
******: pkaying rock music during the breaks
******: great use of the word "shit" on national tv right there
PAbat623: is this really happening
******: im telling you dude
PAbat623: are they interviewing the loser and applauding him like he is axel rose
******: wait until they play the rock music
******: haha
******: i watched the first match and it was ridiculous
PAbat623: "just wanted to thank you for being a part of the best match ive ever seen"
PAbat623: love the hyperboleBab617: yup
******: i love the anderson cooper attire alsoBab617: oh by the way
******: did i tell you im now a weekend anchor
PAbat623: FUCK ya
PAbat623: dude nice
PAbat623: wow
PAbat623: that was fucking fast
******: im now.....
PAbat623: what are you ghandi
******: nope....
******: im an....
******: ANCHORMAN
PAbat623: fact or fiction: everyone at the match is sporting their retro "canon: rebel"
PAbat623: WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON OH MY GOD
******: fact times three
******: im telling you dude
******: you gotta watch the next match
PAbat623: EVERYONE AT THIS MATCH HAS REFRESHED MY BELIEF IN THE HUMAN SPIRIT
******: eevry single point he wins they'r eon their feet
******: john mcenroe is displaying how he lost his CNBC show after three months
******: this is his fourth "final question"
PAbat623: this has completely -- in my five minutes watching it - completely lost all concept of reality and perspective on the event thats actually happening
******: its like regis philbin out there "is that your final answer"
PAbat623: "thank you, man!"
******: haha yeh
PAbat623: that deserved a parting man embrace
PAbat623: "i think we all dreamed a dream tonight. and its one of those dreams you hope you never wake up from?"
******: haha
******: aight im out
PAbat623: congrats man
PAbat623: thats awesome
******: yeh
******: im kind fo a big deal
PAbat623: such a big deal
PAbat623: peace man
******: people know me
******: hahaha
PAbat623: take care
******: later man
******: im going to miami saturday morn
******: i'll call you wasted from miami-fsu
PAbat623: have a great time -- awesome so jealous
PAbat623: ill answer drunk from milwaukee, with my robin yount
PAbat623: bobble head doll
******: hahahaha
To
a great day, and to my friends.
BTW when I am done with this book I am reading i will explain what its all about. intense.
Ok, today I completely figured out my golf swing, accomplished more at work than 15 of my co-workers combined, and found a great polo shirt at target. what a day. the perfect cap to it, came at the end of the tonight as i got home from Public House...
(the following conversation happened at 11:12pm on thursday evening with *****)
******: yo tell me you are watching this tennis
PAbat623: ah man no hold on
******: very few times will you ever hear me say that but this is ridiculous
******: its a rock concert taking place on a tennis court
PAbat623: jesus what channel
******: USAA
******: USA
PAbat623: crazy
******: they have been this loud for every point the last 30 minutes ive been watching
PAbat623: who knew andre aggasi is the country's favorite hero
******: pkaying rock music during the breaks
******: great use of the word "shit" on national tv right there
PAbat623: is this really happening
******: im telling you dude
PAbat623: are they interviewing the loser and applauding him like he is axel rose
******: wait until they play the rock music
******: haha
******: i watched the first match and it was ridiculous
PAbat623: "just wanted to thank you for being a part of the best match ive ever seen"
PAbat623: love the hyperboleBab617: yup
******: i love the anderson cooper attire alsoBab617: oh by the way
******: did i tell you im now a weekend anchor
PAbat623: FUCK ya
PAbat623: dude nice
PAbat623: wow
PAbat623: that was fucking fast
******: im now.....
PAbat623: what are you ghandi
******: nope....
******: im an....
******: ANCHORMAN
PAbat623: fact or fiction: everyone at the match is sporting their retro "canon: rebel"
PAbat623: WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON OH MY GOD
******: fact times three
******: im telling you dude
******: you gotta watch the next match
PAbat623: EVERYONE AT THIS MATCH HAS REFRESHED MY BELIEF IN THE HUMAN SPIRIT
******: eevry single point he wins they'r eon their feet
******: john mcenroe is displaying how he lost his CNBC show after three months
******: this is his fourth "final question"
PAbat623: this has completely -- in my five minutes watching it - completely lost all concept of reality and perspective on the event thats actually happening
******: its like regis philbin out there "is that your final answer"
PAbat623: "thank you, man!"
******: haha yeh
PAbat623: that deserved a parting man embrace
PAbat623: "i think we all dreamed a dream tonight. and its one of those dreams you hope you never wake up from?"
******: haha
******: aight im out
PAbat623: congrats man
PAbat623: thats awesome
******: yeh
******: im kind fo a big deal
PAbat623: such a big deal
PAbat623: peace man
******: people know me
******: hahaha
PAbat623: take care
******: later man
******: im going to miami saturday morn
******: i'll call you wasted from miami-fsu
PAbat623: have a great time -- awesome so jealous
PAbat623: ill answer drunk from milwaukee, with my robin yount
PAbat623: bobble head doll
******: hahahaha
To
a great day, and to my friends.
BTW when I am done with this book I am reading i will explain what its all about. intense.
I'm Moving!
As fun as the myspace blogging is, and for as easy as it is, I really don't understand much about that website. I can't figure out how to modify much of anything - and besides, with every single student on the site at the school I work for, I dont really think its the best place for anything. I intend on continuing to annoy people on their profiles however. That mainly applies to Vic and Deirdre - profile posting all stars.
More later - right now I'm debating either heading to the gym or finishing an entire home run inn pizza thats in my refrigerator. Home Run Inn pizza is like pizza + english muffin with a little too much butter. I'm not sure if its officially known as the best Chicago pizza or not - but news for you - it isn't.
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